Why should she talk to me like that? How dare she? Is something wrong with her? I shrieked, panting heavily in the midst of two young men, attempting to calm me down.
“Please calm down bro, that is how girls of nowadays behave. They have no regard for anybody. Always ready to insult anybody.”
“Can you imagine?” I blurted, expressing an irritated facial reaction.
“Calm down bro. Just let her be. Don’t let her ruin your day, please” the other guy pleaded, soothing his left hand through my shoulders.
“But what really happened?” he asked.
Well, it was last night. Few minutes to the hour of 10pm.
I sighted a lady through the transparent glass walls of one of the boutiques in Shoprite, admiring a dress on a mannequin. Her upright standing posture which faced the dummy backed me, so I couldn’t see her face.
I knew her. I was sure. She needed not to display her face to me to tell who she was. This is Chika, my long lost crush who turned down my marriage proposal for reasons best known to her last year, I thought.
“Now, let me take her by surprise, to make her smile again. Let me touch her sweet and soft body again. Oh, what a pleasure it would be, what a beautiful reunion this would be… she must be excited to see me again” I whispered rhetorically as I surreptitiously tiptoed to where she was and tickled her at either side of her hips.
Quickly, she turned around. It wasn’t Chika. It was an angry face. She was piqued at my approach. She was mad.
I was ashamed. I was afraid. I wanted to run away. I thought she would slap me.
“Who are you!!” she yelled,
I dodged, irritably with my hands shield-guarding my face against possible slaps.
“I said, who are you?” she yelled again.
“I am… sorry, my name is Ajike Ogbu…oshi….”
“Ajike, or whatever you call yourself, do I know you?”
“No. Not exactly. I am sorry, I thought it was …”
“You thought it was who?”
“I am so sorry… it was a mis…”
“You should be sorry for yourself! How dare you touch me?”
People gathered. Questions filled the air. “What is the matter?” “What is happening here?” “Who touched who?”
“Is it not this clown? I was on my own o… all of a sudden, this joker came from nowhere and romanced me from behind…”
“But do you know him?” a lady’s voice asked from the little crowd.
“No ooo! See me see trouble o! Where this joker come from abeg?
“Hold it right there!” I barked. “I will not have you insult me for a simple mistake!”
“How dare you talk to me!” she yelled, approaching me for a fight.
“How dare you talk to me too? Who the hell do you think you are?”
“Why did you touch me in the first place?”
“And why shouldn’t I touch you?” I queried, displaying readiness for battle.
Just then, two gentlemen embraced me and calmly escorted me away from the scene.
written by: kelechi Obasi